Okay ladies, let’s get real. REAL QUICK! We all have that list of everything we wish for in our partner. Our pros and cons of what we could compromise on, if he doesn’t have everything on the list, but came close. Is he not tall, dark, handsome, with money? But average in height, team light-skinned, good on the eye, and struggling a little right now but there is potential. What is your list? If the tables turned and you had to use your list against yourself, would you make the cut to marry yourself? Better yet would you even date yourself?
Talking to the Ladies..
Let me say this first, standards are of the utmost! This is not a post about lowering your standards. What this post is about is women realizing that sometimes their list shouldn’t have certain items on it. Especially when you aren’t able to check it off as something you are able to give. I would love to find a man that’s tall, dark, handsome, a millionaire, works hard, no kids, body made like a Greek god (I have everything but the millionaire and no kids, but I love him even more because of this). I can’t expect everything on this list to be checked off IF I can’t say the same. So why add something to a list that you don’t have or show the potential to get?
Some of us are struggling, living with our parents because we don’t have good credit, borrowing clothes from friends, etc. Yet we want someone who has it all. Listen it’s okay to find someone who doesn’t have all the boxes checked at the moment. Hell, it’s okay to find someone who isn’t going to check off all of your boxes. As women, we have to realize the potential in our kings. They may not have everything checked off on that wish list. Yet, with the right person by their side some of those unchecked boxes can turn into checked boxes. A partner should help elevate and motivate you.
Hey King, You’re Not in the Clear!
Kings, just because women have this list doesn’t mean you can’t have one of your own. Kings should know a true queen when they see her. You can’t want to have a hit it and quit it during your younger days, then wake up wanting something else later on. Men have to think for every woman you have fooled with and didn’t pursue for a long-term/lifetime goal, you are messing her up. You are the reason her list is long and demanding. No, you may not be the reason that particular woman you’re trying to “wife up” isn’t working, but someone is. If you were like that, then you need to stop. So while you are out getting your oats sewn, remember that one day that woman is going to become someone’s wife. It will take some time for healing to happen and she may even be mad at all men.
Thing is YOUR lists aren’t too different from ours. Men are the easier of the two to please. BUT they are harder to penetrate the walls. Men you all have a sense of knowing who real queens are. You tend to run from them because the idea of her seeing your potential frightens you. When you are ready to aim for the goals, you know it. She, just like you, may not check off all the things on your list. Working together you rise above all odds, if you give her the chance. You are able to see in her what she sees in herself and more.
Listen the goal in each relationship once you hit a certain age is longevity. Allowing yourself to find the one that helps push you to where you need to go in life. As I stated above, having standards is one thing everyone should have. Don’t allow anyone to lower your standards based on something they have said or done. At the same time, make sure your standards are obtainable on your own as well. Nothing is worse than not having goals and being able accomplish them. If you can accomplish goals by yourself, just imagine what the correct person in your life can help you carry out.
What we think we need and what He knows we need aren’t always the same thing. Once that realization happens you can open your mind to true possibilities of happiness. Don’t turn your nose up at that young man trying to get your attention by saying “Hello Beautiful” ladies. Guys don’t be afraid to reach out to that single young woman who you have had your eyes on. Allow yourself to be approachable. If it doesn’t work, it doesn’t work! BUT you will never know if you automatically decline someone just because they don’t check everything off on your list. You learn that sometimes the items on your list really don’t matter as much as you may believe when you open yourself up. Enjoy the dating life!