Yeah you read it correctly, I’m taking applications for new friends. Okay, I recently told my husband and daughter that I truly have no friends. Those reading this, if you feel some kind of way about reading this just know that if you are truly a friend we’ve talked about this and you are considered a family member. I wrote a post a while ago about friends/friendships. It seems as though it rubbed some people the wrong way, and I’m completely fine with that. It also opened up room for movement. My circle seems to have gotten smaller around that time and I can say I’m glad about it.
We have to be selective about those that we have in our circle. Your circle gives people a look at you and your goals, morals, personality, etc. What you give off is what attracts others to you. If what you are attracting isn’t where you see yourself going, it’s time to take a step back.
Listen, I’m not going to say that I’m happy not to have any friends. I want more friends, but I’m choosing to make sure that my friendships now align with my lifestyle. I want friends that are hustling. They are aligning what they do to make sure they are taking care of their lives and those of their family.
I have associates and friends that are single, but I’ve realized that they all don’t share the understanding of a family dynamic. Some of them don’t get that I can’t just up and say let’s go out tonight or tomorrow without clearing things with my husband to make sure that he doesn’t have plans and can take care of our daughter. I sometimes want to go out and have a good time listening to music and having a drink or two or go to brunch and talk about our lives and business ventures. BUT I’m not trying to kick it so hard like I did 10 years ago.
I love having a small circle though. When I tell folks all the time, I don’t like people, and they laugh and say they don’t believe me. I am a true introvert. I’m glad to be alone working on something or reading by myself majority of the time. Yet those times when I want to be around people, it’s only certain people I want to deal with our be around because it is important that I keep my energies positive.
I want those that we can sit around and not have to worry about what I’m saying is going to go back to the world. Being comfortable when I talk to them about my issues, them telling me the truth no matter how I may take it and push me to be better are the type of relationships I need now. The grind is real. As millennials we are changing the world in a way that makes everything and everyone rethink systems.
I fellow hometown vlogger Rhondafully_Made recently posted a live video about Shifts and Transitions that was monumental to me. She speaks about revamping herself and brand to be what she knows needs to happen. Sometimes we move too much right after asking God for something or knowing we need to do something and not resting so that we can hear what He has to say. Rest allows you to replenish yourself. When you are tired you make decisions that may or may not hinder where you need to go. Sit still and learn to listen. That’s one reason I haven’t been posting as much.
Applications are Out
I’m only allowing certain people who meet MY requirements in my circle. Not only will “applications” be screened, but those that have been in my life that can’t adhere to where I want to go will be served a pink slip. Getting older you realize that you can’t share you life with everyone, family included at times. You have to learn to love from a distance. I’ve been that friend that is the only one reaching out and checking in on people and it’s time out for it! I’m NOT doing it. Friendships aren’t one-sided and if you can’t pour into me as I pour into you, baby this open bar is pass the time for last call and is official closed.
I recently saw a video of Miss USA 2016 Deshauna Barber where she talks about her and her best friend. She states that she met her, her freshman year. They are competitive with each other, but not in a jealous way. Miss Barber states that her friend called and told her she was going to get her masters, she said 10 minutes after she hung up the phone she went and applied to graduate school. She said I couldn’t let her be more educated than me. Barber goes on to say that her circle is filled grinders and that they are all hungry. That’s the kind of circle I want. We need to push each other to the point if you aren’t on it, you feel like you’re the weak link and push yourself to rise to the occasion.
Don’t get me wrong! I’m not saying that everyone in your circle has to have a certain degree or level of education. What I am saying is you need to all be in the same positive vibe in order to escalate your potentials endeavors. My fellow classmates are made of amazing women and are doing great things. I’m going to be a vendor at a collaborative even this weekend. One of them is my classmate and some fellow peers I went to school with are hosting said event. It just goes to show that not only have they made it to a certain goal in life, but they are reaching back to the place they call home and empowering others to do so. That’s the energy I want to be around.
Selection and Approval
Put it this way, if you see my number pop up or a text in your messages on a constant, just know that it’s because I truly want you in my life. People are leaving this place quicker than ever it seems. I just want to embrace those that are giving off vibes/auras that are amazing and true to this person that I am evolving to. I am working on being transparent and showing myself more in not only post but my social media. If you aren’t floating when you are around friends like I have been lately when I do get around mine, just rest and the way you should go will come to you.